50 Shades of Disappointed

So the Fifty Shades of Grey trailer is finally out. I know most of you, if not all, have already seen it or at the least heard about it. While you have probably made up your mind either way about it, I still had to give my two cents.

When it comes to the trilogy- yes, I read it. Was it a literary masterpiece? Not by any stretch of the imagination. Would I read it again? Probably not. Was it a water cooler book, one that I talked with others about for a while? Yes.

Was it entertaining? Yes it was.

We can debate all day about whether the book was good or not but the fact is, it was indeed a cultural phenomenon. I was not surprised that it was optioned into a film. With as much buzz that surrounded it, I assumed it would be able to make the distributors a little bit of money.

Now let me first say this, I have low expectations for the film. When I saw low, I mean LOW. Especially when I saw that the movie is going to be rated R. I am still staunchly against that because if you are supposed to make a film that is true to the book then there needs to be detail and there is only so much detail that can be placed in a R rated film when we’re talking about a book of this nature. I thought it needed to be NC-17.

Anyway, the trailer premiered late last week and after watching it a few times, I am sad to say that I am disappointed. I got a few bones to pick but the main issue I have is with Christian Grey.

Now, admittedly I have never seen any of Jamie Dornan’s work (the guy who is playing Christian Grey) but for me he falls short. Where is the sexy?! Christian is supposed to be sex on a stick. I don’t get that from the trailer. According to E.L. James words, or at least what I THOUGHT she was trying to say, Christian is supposed to be drop dead gorgeous and irresistible. I would probably pass Dornan on the street and wouldn’t think twice.

Where is the extra hmmph? Are they saving that for 2nd trailer? Where is the Christian that is supposed to be able to handle Ana with just a look or a word? He was missing.

I’m not a fan of the casting choice so far but then again I am basing all of this off of the two minute trailer. Maybe the second one will be better but as of right now, I don’t feel warm or fuzzy or however the hell I am supposed to feel after watching that. I don’t get it. Where is the slight layer of danger that is supposed to lurk right beneath the surface that should make Ana hesitant? Then again, Ana was always damn hesitant about something. But shouldn’t I be slightly afraid of him while at the same time enamored? -_-

Now this is not to say that I won’t be watching the film when it opens on Valentine’s Day weekend next year because I will. I’ll probably even write a review on it – I just expected a tad bit better. Yeah, I know, I wanted too much but so what?

Either, or – here is the trailer in case you have been living under a rock and haven’t seen it yet.

Side note, I hope they haven’t made Ana as ditsy in this film as she was in the trilogy because I swear, I wanted to shake some sense into her just about every dang page!!

P.S. I KNOW one thing for certain. If it is true that Sylvia Day’s Crossfire series will be turned into a film as well, they better do not even mess up the casting of Gideon Cross cus’ honey… Whew! [Yes, I read that too – judge me not.]

P.P.S. My cousin, Brianna, put up an image of Matt Bomer on Instagram after the trailer premiered and I do agree that he would have made a great Christian Grey. I’m not sure he would want to make that type of film though.

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Natalya

Natalya is an Account Manager by day and an editor and author's assistant to passionate creatives by night. When she is not adding to her enormous book collection or stationery supply, she is catching up on her favorite television shows.

Natalya is the author of All The Things I Never Said, a soul-stirring collection of short stories, prose and love letters for the soulful wanderers, the brokenhearted and the hopeless romantics.

You can follow her rantings and occasional sparks of brilliance on Twitter @NatalyaMuncuff.